The Purse

The epitome of my life is summed up by the picture of my purse below:

Look at all that shit!

I am so unorganized, it sucks balls.  For real.

This weekend I did something shitty...totally inadvertant, but still shitty nonetheless.  In the grand scheme of life, what I'm about to tell you, is not really a big deal.  But, it's really the icing on the cake for me.  I had RSVP'd to a birthday party for a little girl that Gregory attends "baby school" with.  This little girl and Gregory are little kindred spirits...since they were infants.  Since they could interact, they have been best buddies.  They hug each other when the arrive and leave daycare, they share their food and snacks with each other.  Last weekend at Gregory's party, he ran to her and yelled her name and gave her the biggest hug.  They are totally adorable.

Today when I dropped off Gregory, his teachers told me they "missed us yesterday".  Dumbfounded, I was like, "What?".  Then they said the simple little phrase, "We missed you at Cadence's birthday party yesterday."  OH FUCKING HELL.  I was devastated.  Not only because I missed the party, but because I am so fucking unorganized that it was my sheer incompetence that made me miss the party.  To top it off, I lied...to the mom.  Told her Gregory was still stick and just not at 100%.  I felt awful lying, but I wasn't big enough to admit I forgot...I didn't want her to think she wasn't important. 

Then I left daycare, and had a complete meltdown on the way to work.  This single event is the cherry on the top of a very messy, melty, sticky ice cream cone that is my life.  It's been this perpetual cycle for the last couple years that has me into meltdown mode.  I'm a working mom, and although I want no pity for this, it is hard sometimes to try and manage every detail.  I fuck it up often and I feel horrible about it, but I don't change.  It's insanity

Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

~ albert einstein

My day usually starts off crappy because I'm dreading the day ahead, because I loathe my job, then it just builds up over and over.  I get lazy, I see too many unsurmountable tasks and I give up.  This is just a crazy time for us...my hubby is in a job that requires a lot of overtime, so my nights are usually spent flying solo.  Nights can be rough too because the kids are tired, Penelope has homework, violin practice that she fights me tooth and nail on, messy rooms, etc.  

Well, today I made a vow to change.  I have to or I will freak the hell out and go crazy.

I have to say tonight was awesome.  I did everything using "timers" and it worked wonderfully with Penelope.  We got everything done that we normally can't find time for and she was still in bed at normal time of 8:30.  

Some things I did differently tonight:

•  After dinner, set the timer on the stove for 20 minutes.  Told Penelope this was our "Tidy Timer" and she had to pick up her room.  I also used the time to clean up the kitchen, pick up the bathoom, organize the little things that so easily get out of place, etc.  At the end of 20 minutes, she wasn't quite done, so she begged for 10 minutes to finish.  What?  Excuse me?  She wants more time to clean her room?  I'm pretty sure it's because she felt like she was playing a game with the whole timer thing.  After the second timer went off, we were done cleaning for the night and it felt good to know we got a ton of stuff done in 30 short minutes. 
• After the mini clean-up, I put the baby in bath, let him play, and while I was sitting there I had Penelope practice her violin.  I had her do a specific task 10 times.  If she got lazy about it, I wouldn't let her go past that number until she got it right.  It worked.  By the last few times she was really paying attention and when she finished she felt accomplished.  The best part was it kept her interest because we only spent about 10 minutes practicing, but it was quality practice.  And, I bathed the baby during all of this, so he was done when we were done.  Score.  Then we read the baby a book and put him to bed. 
• It was 7:53 and instead of putting Penelope in the shower, I set the timer again for 7 minutes and we practiced her dribbling and foot control techniques for soccer practice.  It was good for me too, because we ran around the house for 7 minutes and I got my heart rate up too.
• We did a few pages of homework, got her showered, in bed and read a book.  I was really happy.  She was happy.  We got so much accomplished without any tantrums...very smooth sailing.   I think my approach has just been wrong all along
• Also, the TV did not come on at all until the kids went to bed.  I told her TV was going to be dramatically cut.  She was bit put off, but then I told her what an awesome job she did tonight, and how things like that allow her privileges and rewards and she was excited.   For the first time, in a very long time, I felt like our time together was quality time...and we accomplished a lot.
• I also picked out the week's remaining outfits for Penelope, Junior Mint and myself.  No more searching for crap in the morning.

I know this new routine will take some major adjustments on my part and time to work itself into habit, but I am so ready.  How will I ever be successful in other parts of my life, if I feel like the most elementary parts of my life are in utter and complete shambles?

But, I have to try, right?

So, tell me...what are some techniques you use to keep yourself organized?  

♥
Olivia

I Think I am "That Parent"...The Prude

So, I think I'm that prude parent.  You know that one the imposes all these rules on their children in order to make sure they are well-rounded, well-mannered, smart young people.  But, I can't help but think that maybe our rules might be slightly detrimental to our girl Penelope.

A little backstory...Greg and I have always pretty much sensored how and what she watches.  Educational programs on Sprout, Noggin or Nick Jr. now, and Disney Channel.  Programs that helped her learn things as well as keeping her interest.  The first time she counted to 3 in Chinese I about died...Thank You Kai-Lan.  Or the time she told me she wanted to go to Paris and see the Eiffel Tower...Thank You Little Einsteins.  Or the time I made something for dinner that she wasn't too keen on trying and she chanted her little mantra of "Try it! You might like it!"...Thank You Yo Gabba Gabba.  Up to this point I thought (and I still think we are for the most part) we were doing pretty well...until the following situation.

This last weekend I helped my sister-in-law host a "Spa Party" for my niece Bianca who was turning 8 years old.  It was awesome and lots of fun.  We gave them mani and pedis, curled their hair, let them put on little kid make-up (all with their parents permission), and it was a great time.  Part of the festivities were allowing the girls to dress up in their favorite party dresses and have a fashion show and then they wanted to do a "concert".  Basically this meant singning and dancing to Hannah Montana, that chick from iCarly, and Selena Gomez.  Insert prude mom here.  I don't let Penelope watch that stuff.  I make her grandparents aware that when she is with them, she is not allowed to watch those programs.  It's something that Greg and I have a pretty firm stance on...she is only 5 after all, and we don't feel she needs to be subjected to teenage angst just yet.  The only time she ever sees these programs are when she stays with Bianca.  My brother and sister-in law don't have the same views as we do, and even though they know our stance, they don't alter their routine at their house when Penelope stays, just like we don't alter ours when Bianca stays with us.  I get it...I know she'll be exposed to it...all the time.  You can't walk into any clothing store and pick up something remotely cute without having some member of the Disney Movement plastered all over it.  It was hell trying to find a back pack and lunch box that was age appropriate...Thank You Hello Kitty. 

But the detrimental part happened when I looked over and Penelope was singled out.  She didn't know the words to the songs, and she didn't feel comfortable.  It broke my heart and I wondered if I am going to make her a complete nerd.  Believe me, sometimes I want her to be the nerd because society is so screwed up and different than when I was growing up and I feel like if she is the nerd I can protect her more, but then of course I don't want her to be the nerd because that just sucks too.  But what to do?  Honestly  the songs I did hear, weren't bad.  The lyrics were fine and honestly, she probably hears worse words when Greg and I play our music.  But, where is the line?  She's not 8, but she acts like an 8-year old and has the vocabulary of an 8-year old.  And don't even get me started on Kids Bop.  Those songs don't suddenly become okay just because a chorus of kids are singing the song.  But, I have to give props to their marketing people...way to take the exploitation of children to the next level!

So, I think I'm going to do a little more research and if the songs of the Disney Movement members turn out to be okay, then I think I'll start letting her at least listen to some of the music.  She loves to dance and sing and maybe that's one way I can let her experience a little bit of what everyone else seems to be enjoying all the while keeping her my little girl for as long as I possibly can.

I want to know your thoughts on this...please comment till your heart is content and forward on to your friends.  I'm even throwing in a $10 iTunes gift card to one lucky commenter...random drawing on Sunday evening. 

Peace out.

Olivia

Getting Back...

In the last month or so, I've kinda quit blogging.  Not because I don't love doing it, but because it seems trivial to me...like I'm being selfish.  My topics seem so dumb because my mind is constantly consumed with my dear friend Maya and that fact that her 4 year-old son was just diagnosed with Stage 4 Neuroblastoma cancer. 

I feel guilty rambling on about my newest recipe or that fact that I am an official GLEEK! and my full fledged obsession with Sue Sylvester.  But I've been thinking about it, and Maya used to enjoy reading my blogs, and even though her "normal" no longer exists, it's okay that mine does.  But this situation has changed my life.  For a long time I've wanted to pour my heart and soul into a charity that meant something to me.  Now I can and I know my time and efforts will make a difference.  I've signed up to do the Relay for Life event on October 2-3rd, and my team is currently in 1st place! Yes!  And, I've been asked to speak about Ronan's story for the "Survivor Segment" of the relay.  I have to tell you...I am petrified of public speaking, but what an honor, huh?  An opportunity to spread the word about Ronan is an opportunity I don't want to miss.  I'll probably be a blubbering fool, but as my husband told me, "No guts.  No glory."  My soul purpose is get as many people praying and sending good vibes to Ronan as possible.  I'm also a part of The Ronan Thompson Foundation that Maya and her husband set up.  All proceeds for the time being will benefit them for their medical expenses and neuroblastoma research.  They have huge plans for this foundation to help fund research and help other families out that are going through the same thing as they are now.  I am so excited that I will be a part of this.  It is truly an honor.  To follow their story, please visit Rockstar Ronan.

In other news...

Penelope has been in kindergarten for a little over a month now and she amazes me.  She's already reading 3-4 word sentences, she's growing up so fast, and she's fiercely independent which makes so happy, yet scares the hell out of me all at the same time.  Time goes by so fast...trying to soak up all those little moments while I can.

My little Junior Mint (my nickname for Gregory since he is a Junior) is getting totally big too.  Just found out today that he has an epigastric hernia that will require surgery.  It's minor and I'm thankful, but I've been sweating bullets for a few weeks now from first seeing his pediatrician, to the radiologist to finally the pediatric surgeon.  The pediatrician couldn't feel or see anything, the ultrasound technologist made me feel crazy because she couldn't feel or see anything and the ultrasound came back negative, but the surgeon immediately felt what I had seen and confirmed that something wasn't right.  Mother's intuition is never wrong.  So, we have outpatient surgery scheduled in October. 

So, as always, thank you for stopping by.  Try not to take people for granted...be thankful for your health...give those little ones an extra hug and kiss, and allow peace to fill your heart.

xoxo-Olivia

Weekend Rewind

Friday night I spruced up the house while hubby had an impromptu happy hour with a guy from work who decided that day, he had wasted enough of his life in a cube. Empowering! I’m also jealous! Best part was Greg’s text later in the night, “OMG. I’m knee-deep in douche.” They were at a bar off the beaten path in Old Town Scottsdale. Greg said for the majority of the night, it was low-key, but then the magic hour of 10 p.m. happened and all the douche bags came out of hiding. This prompted Greg’s Facebook status for Saturday morning: “Spent the evening in Old Town. Spring Break/Training in the air brings out the ladies, which in turn brings out the pressed designer shirts, jeans, and Italian leather boots. Ed Hardy hunting parties in search of broken heels and slurred words. Ah, the circle of life.” Greg cracks me up.

Saturday, we took the kids to the Arizona Science Center. It was a great time. Lots of fun stuff to see and explore. Think Greg and I may have had more fun exploring. It cost $35 for all of us to get in. Not bad. To see the really cool exhibits costs extra, so it could easily turn into a Disneyland experience with regards to forking money over. There is enough to do without the extra exhibits on your first time going.  There were even a few places we could let the Fat Boy down and run around.  He was digging all the blocks and open space.

Bad lighting + camera phone = crappy blurred picture.

Penelope tried rock climbing on a rock wall. She did pretty good, but got panicked a bit once she was well above our heads. But, she got down like a champ and we were just proud that she was brave enough to try it.

Getting instructions...

Climbing...

Getting a little scared...Daddy talking her through it.

Sunday was just tinkering around the house and a neighborhood princess party to attend to. Ended our weekend by grocery shopping where the next little tidbit happened. Although it does sound funny, it kinda through Greg and I for a loop we hadn’t anticipated dodging for some time.

In the line at the store:

Greg: (Mouths to me) “Look at your daughter.”

Of course she’s my daughter when she does something bad. It’s okay, I do the same thing to Greg!

I look over and Penelope is face-to-face kissing the US/People/Star whatever smut magazine. Literally mouth puckered on the mag, moving her head back and forth.

I gasp, look at Greg who looks like he might vomit or die of hysterics, or maybe both at the same time.

Me: “Penelope! What are you doing??”

Penelope: “Nothing.” As she shyly twists and turns and turns red from embarrassment.

What the fuck people? Seriously. She is 4 ½.

Me: “You need to stop that. It’s inappropriate for a little girl like you.”
Penelope: “Ok Mama.”

Greg is rubbing his head, shaking it in a “No” fashion, and I can tell his blood pressure is rising. Penelope is his baby girl…no boys allowed ever! Especially not at 4 years old.

We get settled in the truck, and we ask her why she was kissing the magazine. Sheepishly she replies that she doesn’t know. But with gentle prodding we ask her again and her reply is, “Because Mama! I wanted to kiss a handsome boy.”

Oh Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck!

Oh it gets better. The “Handsome Boy” she wanted to kiss, was Cory Fucking Haim!! Rest In Peace, but please!

We both told her it was not appropriate for her to kiss boys at this age. Yadda Yadda Yadda. I know this is part of growing up, but shit…I don’t really want to have to explain the depths of the birds and the bees already. She picks up so much crap at school and it’s disheartening. My only saving grace at this point, is her moral compass is pretty strong and she comes home and tells me things that she doesn’t think are right. She trusts us as her parents…trusts that she can tell us things and she won’t get in trouble. I feel old-fashioned, but I’m just not ready for this. I don’t think it’s right and I don’t think it’s cute, and I think as parents we shouldn’t egg this type of behavior on. I’ll get off my soap box now.

Anybody have a great cocktail recipe?

Trying To Find My Nut...

You know it is time to find a new job when you get excited to see the office squirrel on his daily lunch break and you compare yourself to him.

I wish I could just lazily eat in the nice afternoon sun.


I wonder how his fur gets so shiny and soft looking. My hair looks like a Brillo pad. Or worse yet a Jonas Brother*.

I wonder if I ate nothing but grass if my hair would look like that.


He’s kinda fat. We have something in common.


I wonder if he has family in that cement planter he runs into.


I hope they never catch him in the metal bait boxes they have everywhere.

Ugh. Then I’m snapped back to reality when someone asks me what I’m doing.

Back to the grind.

*Why my hair looks like a Jonas Brother.

Saturday morning conversation with Penelope:

She’s staring at me and my bed head and she’s trying not to laugh. Then she asks in a shy but comical voice…

“Mama? You wanna know what your hair looks like?”


“What baby?”

“A Jonas Brother!!!!” She manages to squeak that out in between bouts of hysterical laughter.

My mouth drops open and my eyes pop and I start laughing.

“Yeah, Mama! You look like the curly-headed-Jonas Brother!!!!”

Fan-fucking-tastic. 

Be Still My Beating Heart

Conversation between Penelope and Baby G:

Well, it was just P talking sweetly in her big sister voice as G listened attentively.

"I love you baby brother. I love you so much. You're a part of my heart now. Forever."

I seriously just love my little girl! She is just so cute.

My Favorite Place...

To kiss her. Is right there...that little hollow place on the back of her neck.

Melt My Heart!

Penelope got a camera for Christmas! How cute is this! LOVE IT!