One Step At A Time...

I didn’t know him very long, but he changed my life.  He changed me as a person.  He broke my heart and healed it all at once.  He lit a fire in my soul to change the world that I didn’t even know existed. 

www.rockstarronan.com
The Ronan Thompson Foundation

He died.

They make me want to change the world.  To break down doors, to bust down barriers, to not take no for an answer.  I want to make them proud of me.  I want them to grow old with their own beautiful families.  

I do not want them to die before me.

Children’s cancer research is grossly underfunded and it’s time for it to stop.  Our babies deserve a voice, they deserve us to never stop fighting for them.  They need advocates, and it’s our responsibility as an older generation to never give up on them and FIGHT, because they cannot do these things on their own.  We brought them into this world, we must never give up on them.  We owe this to them.

I don’t need an urn full of ashes to make me want to fight.  Imagining it...fuck...that is gut-wrenching enough for me to want to DO SOMETHING.

I found this website

Who We Are

The Children’s Oncology Group (COG) is the world’s largest, cooperative children’s cancer research entity. It brings together treatment centers, physicians, laboratory scientists, nurses, psychologists and others working to beat cancer in children, adolescents and young adults. Through collaborative research, the Children’s Oncology Group has improved rates for children’s cancer at a pace much faster than any one individual or single institution could accomplish alone. The Children’s Oncology Group research has turned children’s cancer from a virtually incurable disease 40 years ago to one with an overall cure rate of 78 percent today.
Despite major advancements in recent years, much work remains to find treatments and cures for children’s cancer. Cancer remains the leading cause of death by disease in children and two-thirds of patients have life-altering and life-threatening side effects from the currently available treatments. Children’s Oncology Group research efforts are focused on many types of cancer including those that are hardest to treat, as well as reducing complications that result from treatment.
The Children’s Oncology Group is chaired by Peter Adamson, MD. Dr. Adamson is Chief of the Division of Clinical Pharmacology & Therapeutics and Director of the Office of Clinical and Translational Research at The Children's Hospital of Philadelphia. Susan Blaney, MD is vice chair of the Children’s Oncology Group. Dr. Blaney is Vice Chair for Research in the Department of Pediatrics at Baylor College of Medicine and Deputy Director of Texas Children's Cancer and Hematology Centers.

What We Do

Children’s Oncology Group:

• designs and conducts about 100 clinical trials annually to find the best treatments for children and adolescents with cancer;
• conducts laboratory research that will translate into more effective treatments with reduced side effects;
• looks for the causes of childhood cancer with the goal of one day preventing cancer;
• conducts research to improve quality of life and survivorship; and
• seeks international partnerships, when necessary, to fulfill its mission.

Our History
Children’s Oncology Group was formed in 2000 when four pediatric cancer clinical trials groups joined forces. Comprised of 210 treatment centers in North America, Europe, Australia, New Zealand and South Africa, COG includes more than 6,500 individual members. The COG receives funding from the national non-profit foundation, CureSearch for Children’s Cancer which receives grants from the National Cancer Institute and raises funds through philanthropic donations from individuals, special events, corporations and private foundations.
Children’s Oncology Group hospitals treat 90 percent of children with cancer in the United States, providing the unmatched combination of global expertise and local care. This means that every child and care team has complete access to the latest research and world-class treatments at hospitals within close to home.

Why is Collaborative Research Important?

While nearly 13,500 children and adolescents are diagnosed with cancer each year, there are many different kinds of children’s cancer. When divided into the specific cancer types, the number of children with each is relatively small. In research, large numbers of patients are critical to ensuring that study results are meaningful. By enrolling patients from many hospitals in the same trial, the results become statistically significant. This approach is called collaborative research and is how the Children’s Oncology Group functions.

Get Involved!  

On the curesearch.org site (click here) you can join (free) the advocate group.  Once you fill in your info, it gives you the contact info for your local congressman.  You can set aside time each week to contact your congressman.  They work for us!  It’s time WE tell THEM what we WANT.

I’m on a personal quest, although my journey is for millions.  Help me.  

DO SOMETHING with me.

With all this being said, I’m walking in the CureSearch Walk for Children’s Cancer in February of 2012 in Phoenix.  Right now, I’m a one-man team.  If you’re local, I’d love for you to join my team:  One Step At A Time.  My team goal is $5000.  If I can raise this $5000, it goes directly to Children’s Cancer Research…all of it.  Not just 3%, not just 50%...it all goes to the kids.  I know times are tough, but if you could just give up one treat for yourself (a coffee, a meal, a mani/pedi, etc. and donate it to this great cause, I would be forever grateful.  Together we can make a difference.   One Step At A Time.

Go here to donate: 
http://www.curesearchwalk.org/phoenix/dosomething

In the words of Ben Lee...

What’s in your heart
What’s in your head
It’s one or the other these days
The quick or the dead

Sometimes we gotta fight
So don’t you complain
Cuz I never promised this would be easy babe

You and me gonna rise up
And they will be surprised yup

Everything’s weird
Soon they’ll be gone
Cuz our whispered words
Are louder than bombs

So don’t you lose faith
And say it’s no fun
Cuz we’ve come too far to stop
Before we’re done

You and me gonna rise up
And they will be surprised yup

Sometimes we get lost
But soon we’ll be found
This is far too important
To turn back now

You and me gonna rise up
And they will be surprised yup

♥ ♥ ♥

Olivia

Could Get Used To This...

At home with a sick baby and one big sister who wanted to tag along and stay home as well.  She's his little nurse maid...taking his temp (w/a digital thermometer), checking on him all the time, getting him water, and helping him off the bed to go potty. 


Here they are all snug on our bed.  Wasn't your parents bed the safest most comfortable place to be when you're sick as a wee one?  Greg and I both remember that cozy feeling when we were little and sick and our moms would let us lay in their bed.  Ahh..heaven.

::bad cell phone picture::

They have every pillow, blanket and stuffed animal in the entire house on my bed.  Since last Thursday, Greg has been banished to Penelope's bed, while the sick-o's stay with me.  It's just easier that way for midnight water requests, lots of bathrooms trips for a potty-trained toddler who has to make the grandest spectacle of every little sprout he can muster because, "Mama!  I go potty!!" has to be announced at all times regardless of hour or how sick you are, lots of "Mama, I throw up!!", which will wake any sleeping mother out of the deepest sleep and have her snap to attention as if she were back in boot camp, only to be met with a few spits in the toilet which resemble nothing of vomit, and lots of temperature checking, and medicine giving.  My little Junior Mint has been quite sick, and this virus has given us a run for our money. 


Greg took Friday off to take care of the kids and I thought for sure we'd be on the mend by today.  Quite the contrary, last night was one of the worst nights yet for Junior Mint, and I called in today and took the rug rat back to the doctor.  This time, his strep test still showed negative, same as Saturday's visit to Urgent Care, but he now has an upper respiratory infection.  Awesome.  So, we are on a powerful does of antibiotics.  I just hope they make my little man feel better.


Even though Junior Mint is not feeling well, I am still preparing a nice meal, one of which would normally grace the weekend table.  I'm baking muffins, AND, prepare yourselves, doing laundry.  Best yet, I'm loving every single second of it.  I love the idea of making a home and in all honesty I wish I didn't have to work.  My working isn't necessarily a "have to", more of a "choose to".  We could make it without my salary, but the questions is, do we want to?  Maybe someday, but right the now the benefit (savings, fun money, retirement) of me working still outweighs me not working.  But, you better believe, I am super jealous of all the mamas and wifeys that get to stay at home and work from there. 


I would totally rock the June Cleaver role...I might even serve dinner in a dress with pearls on. 

Happy Monday!

♥ ♥ ♥
Olivia

Church

You probably think I don't go to church or believe in God because I say fuck a lot, huh? 

I do go.  Try to every Sunday.  It's been off and on...mostly off for years, until lately.  We found a church I truly adore, and it fits for our family.  So, I try to go every Sunday.  It brings me peace and renews my faith.

Faith.  That is tricky concept for some.  I get it, many many times my faith has been shook, but at the end of the day, it's there.  I can't explain it. The logical thinking part of me could accept an agnostic or atheist point-of-view given the mere fact I'm believing in something I can't see.  Then just as easily as I can "get that"...it leaves my brain.  And I believe with all my heart in God and His power.  My husband calls that Faith. 

Bad things happen to good people all the time.  And we wonder, "Why would God let that happen?"  I don't know.  I don't have those kind of answers.  But I do have Faith, and I know His plan is not my own, and I do accept that.  Wholeheartedly.  Every single time in my life, when something bad has happened and I have questioned why God would do that to me, or someone I love, it is always revealed to me in His time.  It doesn't mean that it hurts any less, but it is part of my story nonetheless.  It teaches me a valuable lesson, it deepens my Faith, deepens my love.  Deepens me.

The message at Sunday's mass was to live perfectly as God is perfect.  Of course, we can't live perfectly...we are human...falable.  But, the point is to try to live perfectly.  Put others first, live compassionately, let anger and jealousy go, choose to do the right thing in all situations, even when you want to be spiteful, hurtful, or want to seek revenge.  It's not easy to do.  But, just think about how much better your life could be.  How awesome our world could be if we all tryed to live this way.

Whether or not you believe in God is up to you, but trying to live perfectly is a lesson we could all learn regardless of our individual beliefs.

And if there is any question, me and my blog serve the Lord.  Yes, God is aware of my cussing problem, and I am quite certain He still loves me anyway. 

♥
Olivia

Pesto

I'm not a food blogger.


I love food bloggers though.


I love their pictures, their buttery prose about their latest dishes, their ingenious styling.


Alas, that is not me.  My dumpy kitchen with suck-tastic light and my lack of patience means you get one picture on this here blog.  The finished product.  Take it or leave it baby.  I am no Pioneer Woman. 


So, I give you the recipe, and one picture, deal?


Great, onto my latest invention.  I mean I didn't invent this, but I didn't follow a recipe either.

Roasted Walnut Garlic Pesto

This is what I did:

• Toasted walnuts - be careful...there is a fine line between toasted and burned.  I found that out.  If I had to guess how much, about a 1/3 of a cup.
• Roast a head of garlic - take a whole head of garlic, cut the tops off, drizzle olive oil it all, wrap in foil and throw in the oven at 350 degrees.  Roast until your kitchen smells divine.  When done, the garlic will "spread like buttah".  Seriously, I don't time it.  Just smell and check.
• A bunch of fresh basil.  Don't know how much.  I bought one of those containers of it from Trader Joes' and used the whole thing.  Probably two cups.
• About a 1/4 cup of parmesean.  *GASP*  I used the canned stuff...didn't have any fresh on hand.  Deal.
• Olive oil to drizzle in.  Probably about 1/3 cup.
• Juice of one lemon - next time I'll only use 1/2 the lemon.  I suggest starting small and adjust to your taste.
• Salt & Pepper
• Pulse all that stuff up in your food processor.
• Slather on hot buttered french bread for sensory overload!
• Put in glass container and store.  Don't know how long it keeps...I plan to eat it fast.

• Use it on pizzas, sandwiches, on hot pasta, on hot french bread, right off the spoon out of the fridge...yeah I went there.

Enjoy!





♥
Olivia

Changes

So, I've been desperately trying to give up Diet Coke.  I've been drinking it for years.  As I type this, my mouth is watering.  But, I know how bad it really it is for you, so I'm trying to give it up.  I feel like if I swear to never drink it again, I'm just setting myself up for failure.  So, let's just say, I'm working in other options, in hopes that the luster of the Diet Coke can fades quickly.


First of all, I hate plain water.  I mean if it's hot and I'm doing some sort of physical activity...or, more realistically, I've eaten bacon in the last few hours, then I dig some water.  Other than that...gag.  I just can't force myself to drink it.


That is until Spa Water. 

Delicious. 

I've been to two spas in my life and at both, they served this yummy water.  I can drink like a gallon in one sitting with some cucumbers and lemon floating in there.  Give it a try!

So, I ain't gonna lie.  I still need...want...need caffiene.  And, I do love coffee, but it does not love me.  No matter how I take it, I always end up with heartburn and the burps.  Gross.  With that, I've decided to exlusively drink tea for my caffiene addiction.  It has enough so I don't get a headache, but not as much as Diet Coke or coffee.  Win win.  I've been reading Aura Joon's blog for quite some time and she drinks tea all day long.  I've been reading about the health benefits of drinking tea, and I definitely think it's better than me drinking Diet Coke all day long.  I found the loose leaf pure Indian tea that Aura drinks at a local Middle Eastern market called Haji Baba in Tempe.  The tea is so good!  Now, it tastes just like tea, but the only word that comes to my mind is fresh.  It just tastes fresher.  I usually drink it without any sweetner, but if I feel like a little sweetness, I'll add agave nectar or pure honey.  Simple goodness!

Don't you just love my new tea cup?  I love the little lid that goes on top while the loose leaf tea steeps in the little ceramic basket inside the cup!  So freaking cute!!

Oh, at Haji Baba there was a simple sign above the order counter that read:

Amen.

♥

Olivia

Death By Thin Mints

Oh no.

♥
Olivia

The Farm

I am in love with The Farm.


Everytime I go there, I swear I'm going to change my life.


Eat better.  Live Better. 


It's that good.  The food is that yummy!


Today I went with my friend from work...she got the Egg Salad and I got the Farm Fresh Sandwich and then we switched each other a half, and it was D.I.V.I.N.E.  I also had a side salad with their house dressing which I could've drank from a cup.  The best way I can explain it is homemade ranch with basil.  So good!!  I also had a peach pie turnover...oh yeah...I went there...and it gooooooooooooood.


It was perfect weather.  Lots of people were out.  Moms and babies...and play date groups...and people with their dogs...perfect place to lay out your blanket and enjoy your food picnic style.


It's an outdoor restaurant, and they have regular dining tables, bit I prefer the picnic tables out in the old pecan groves. 

If you haven't gone, you simply must go!


♥
Olivia

The Purse

The epitome of my life is summed up by the picture of my purse below:

Look at all that shit!

I am so unorganized, it sucks balls.  For real.

This weekend I did something shitty...totally inadvertant, but still shitty nonetheless.  In the grand scheme of life, what I'm about to tell you, is not really a big deal.  But, it's really the icing on the cake for me.  I had RSVP'd to a birthday party for a little girl that Gregory attends "baby school" with.  This little girl and Gregory are little kindred spirits...since they were infants.  Since they could interact, they have been best buddies.  They hug each other when the arrive and leave daycare, they share their food and snacks with each other.  Last weekend at Gregory's party, he ran to her and yelled her name and gave her the biggest hug.  They are totally adorable.

Today when I dropped off Gregory, his teachers told me they "missed us yesterday".  Dumbfounded, I was like, "What?".  Then they said the simple little phrase, "We missed you at Cadence's birthday party yesterday."  OH FUCKING HELL.  I was devastated.  Not only because I missed the party, but because I am so fucking unorganized that it was my sheer incompetence that made me miss the party.  To top it off, I lied...to the mom.  Told her Gregory was still stick and just not at 100%.  I felt awful lying, but I wasn't big enough to admit I forgot...I didn't want her to think she wasn't important. 

Then I left daycare, and had a complete meltdown on the way to work.  This single event is the cherry on the top of a very messy, melty, sticky ice cream cone that is my life.  It's been this perpetual cycle for the last couple years that has me into meltdown mode.  I'm a working mom, and although I want no pity for this, it is hard sometimes to try and manage every detail.  I fuck it up often and I feel horrible about it, but I don't change.  It's insanity

Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

~ albert einstein

My day usually starts off crappy because I'm dreading the day ahead, because I loathe my job, then it just builds up over and over.  I get lazy, I see too many unsurmountable tasks and I give up.  This is just a crazy time for us...my hubby is in a job that requires a lot of overtime, so my nights are usually spent flying solo.  Nights can be rough too because the kids are tired, Penelope has homework, violin practice that she fights me tooth and nail on, messy rooms, etc.  

Well, today I made a vow to change.  I have to or I will freak the hell out and go crazy.

I have to say tonight was awesome.  I did everything using "timers" and it worked wonderfully with Penelope.  We got everything done that we normally can't find time for and she was still in bed at normal time of 8:30.  

Some things I did differently tonight:

•  After dinner, set the timer on the stove for 20 minutes.  Told Penelope this was our "Tidy Timer" and she had to pick up her room.  I also used the time to clean up the kitchen, pick up the bathoom, organize the little things that so easily get out of place, etc.  At the end of 20 minutes, she wasn't quite done, so she begged for 10 minutes to finish.  What?  Excuse me?  She wants more time to clean her room?  I'm pretty sure it's because she felt like she was playing a game with the whole timer thing.  After the second timer went off, we were done cleaning for the night and it felt good to know we got a ton of stuff done in 30 short minutes. 
• After the mini clean-up, I put the baby in bath, let him play, and while I was sitting there I had Penelope practice her violin.  I had her do a specific task 10 times.  If she got lazy about it, I wouldn't let her go past that number until she got it right.  It worked.  By the last few times she was really paying attention and when she finished she felt accomplished.  The best part was it kept her interest because we only spent about 10 minutes practicing, but it was quality practice.  And, I bathed the baby during all of this, so he was done when we were done.  Score.  Then we read the baby a book and put him to bed. 
• It was 7:53 and instead of putting Penelope in the shower, I set the timer again for 7 minutes and we practiced her dribbling and foot control techniques for soccer practice.  It was good for me too, because we ran around the house for 7 minutes and I got my heart rate up too.
• We did a few pages of homework, got her showered, in bed and read a book.  I was really happy.  She was happy.  We got so much accomplished without any tantrums...very smooth sailing.   I think my approach has just been wrong all along
• Also, the TV did not come on at all until the kids went to bed.  I told her TV was going to be dramatically cut.  She was bit put off, but then I told her what an awesome job she did tonight, and how things like that allow her privileges and rewards and she was excited.   For the first time, in a very long time, I felt like our time together was quality time...and we accomplished a lot.
• I also picked out the week's remaining outfits for Penelope, Junior Mint and myself.  No more searching for crap in the morning.

I know this new routine will take some major adjustments on my part and time to work itself into habit, but I am so ready.  How will I ever be successful in other parts of my life, if I feel like the most elementary parts of my life are in utter and complete shambles?

But, I have to try, right?

So, tell me...what are some techniques you use to keep yourself organized?  

♥
Olivia

It's 2011...Really? Shit.

I really feel behind.


So behind.
I thought 2010 flew by, I think 2011 is already exceeding it at record pace.I'm literally still on the rush from the holidays.  I've been fervently planning a grand circus birthday party for my little Junior Mint who is turning two (!) on the 19th.  Two?  Where the hell did the time go?  I've rented a ramada at a local park and I've invited tons of people.  Lots of family and then I did something very unexpected of me...I invited 24 18-24 month olds!!! I invited all the chunky monkeys from Gregory's "Baby School" (it makes me feel *thismuch* less guilty to say this, instead of daycare).  My husband looked at me with a deer-in-the-headlights look but was on board.


I'll be honest...I never really thought much of extravagant kid birthday parties.  That is until this happened.  And reading this everyday, REALLY puts thing into perspective.  I used to think big birthday parties were a
waste of money.  But, I realized that every year the Good Lord allows me to have my healthy happy babies, I should celebrate them to the fullest.  You just never know what life has in store.  I don't want to ever be in a
hospital room regretting what I have not done for my kids.  They only have one childhood, and I'm determined to make it the best within my means and teaching them lessons about being grateful in the process.  If anything, my kids will be grateful. 


With that being said, I have planned this party on the cheap.  Now cheap doesn't mean less...it just means more manual work.  Sure I could spend a couple hundred dollars on premade stuff on websites, but where is the fun in that?  I'm the crafty-type who enjoys doing things myself, even if it means a lot of work and staying up very late to get it all done. 


I'll have to post pictures later, but so far we will have gunny sack races, fishing game, ball toss, face painting, and a petting zoo.  All my games and prizes and stuff for decorations came from The Dollar Tree.  The whole purpose will be to play the games and get tickets which they will redeem for prizes.  I'm pretty excited for it.  The big ticket item was the petting zoo.  It's only for an hour, but they will bring 15-20 animals, have a hand sanitizing station, and set up with a white picket fence, and do all the clean-up.  If "they" do a good job, I will give all the info later.


In other news...January is proving to be just as busy as December.  My hubby's birthday was yesterday, Junior Mint's is on the 19th, our best friends Joel & Paty are coming in for the party, and Joel's birthday is the 20-something-th (I suck, I know!), Penelope is in the full swing of violin again, she has gifted testing sessions coming up in the next two weeks, I have a business to open (hello!), we're trying to find a house to buy, and then work is picking up pretty heavily.  I don't know how to keep up.  I literally don't have enough hours in the day. And I have a ton of l.a.u.n.d.r.y.  And yet, I'm blogging.  Awesome priorities ;)


I have a lot of goals for 2011, and blogging is one of them.  I so enjoy writing my little online diary, and if I can connect with just one person (Samara!) ;) , then I'm totally happy.


So, stayed tuned...I have a feeling 2011 is going to be a bumpy ride.  In all the right ways!

♥
Olivia

Lists, Lists & More Lists

Have you ever been so busy that you don't know where to start, so you don't start, and then you try to start, but you can't focus because you don't know what you should be focusing on?

Yeah, that's me right now.

I seriously have like a billion "to do" lists, each with different stuff, and all of it seems important, yet I can't figure out where to start! 

So, I've broken it down in assembly line sections.  One thing I'm stressing about is getting my material prepped for printing.  Well, getting it prepped will do me no good if my screens aren't built or burned?  See what I'm getting at?   So, I've made a list of what needs to be done and put it in order...can't get to "B" if you haven't completed "A".  Sounds so remedial as I write this, but I've been struggling a bit the last few days to get into a groove.  I'd find myself in the middle of something, setting it down, to only start on something else, and then ending up with two unfinished projects because my multi-tasking abilities apparently suck.

And, not that I'm complaining, I swear I'm not, but I have a lot of other stuff going on besides Chaps Buffalino stuff.  Home stuff, getting ready to move in the next two months stuff, laundry - my lifetime nemesis stuff, kid stuff, lots of stuff.  If I'm being honest here, maybe I jumped the gun a bit...maybe setting my launch date for 1/1/11 was a bit absurd, but when I ask myself these questions, I answer back with "If not now, when?" 

Well, I purchased Elsie Flannigan's (from A Beautiful Mess) Blog Love E-Course, and let me tell you it has lots of valuable information about blogging and how to fit it all into a busy, hectic schedule.  I highly recommend purchasing it.  I won't go into much detail because that is what the course is for, but I'm putting a few things I learned into action.  I've put together a doable "to do"  list for tonight only and my reward if I get it all accomplished will be my favorite chai tea latte tomorrow on the way to work.  It's not a huge reward, but it does give me a little extra motivation to get my butt in gear and stay on track.  I usually save my tea purchases for the weekend, so if I get my "chores" done tonight, I will get a sweet little reward tomorrow!  Yes!

12/6/10 To Do List

1. Finish making 2 screens
2. Clean up station in garage using for burning screen & printing - getting ready for 12/7 print
3. Clean finished screens - leave to dry in clean space
4. Get artwork 100% ready
5. 2 load of laundry completed (washed, dryed and ugh put away...gross) - seriously when will they invent disposable clothes?  Either that, or I need a wife ;)
6. That huge Christmas party I mentioned in the last post is this weekend, out of town, so I need to start packing for the kids & I, and all the stuff I'm bringing (decorations, games, food, etc.)
7. Type out Christmas Party game directions - easy enough, but it's "one more thing"
8. Make an email contact list for the party...that way next year's communication will be much easier.

I'll let you know how I did on my list tomorrow!  If you have any great tips to staying on task, being organzied, etc., please leave them in the comments below!  I would love to hear all about them.

♥
Olivia

Head is Swirling...

Wow.  I have 28 days until my launch.  And.  I still have A LOT to do.  But in typical fashion, I proscratinate a bit, and then throw down and get crazy busy and productive as the deadline is looming.  It's probably not the best way to work, but for some wierd reason, it really gets the creativity pumping.  I remember in college I would literally be up at midnight writing a paper due the next morning.  I always ended up getting really good grades on my procrastinated work, and ironically enough, the few times I got my stuff done early, my grades were still good, but not great.  Go figure.  This only fueled my proscratination.  But now, I'm not looking at it as a flaw, but rather, a strength.  Even if it only applies to moi.

Since we last spoke, I've gotten a lot accomplished:

• New DBA filed
• Updated all business filings for LLC
• In the process of reclaiming a few screens
• Got a smokin' deal on my silkscreen mesh to make my own screens.  I bought a whole role for $50 less than the marked price.  Come to find out it was mistake on the store's part and the clerk told me the mesh NEVER goes on sale, but she had to sell it to me anyway because that was the marked price.  Score!  And, yes, I do believe I will take that as one my so-loved signs. 
• Settled on my basecloth for my towels and napkins.  It's a 100% cotton, natural cloth.  It kinda looks like linen as it has "rough" look to it.  But it doesn't have the linen price tage.  I know a lot of people rave about linen towels, but I'm not a huge fan.  At least not yet.  I do plan to offer a few linen pieces in the future, but for now...it's all about utility.
• Sourced the vendors/suppliers for my custom twill tape tags
• Decided on my packaging.  It's very simple, yet cool.  Think kraft & newsprint. 
• Have my first collection ready for launch on 1/1/11.  I've entitled it Sea of Love.  It's my homage to the beach and how I grew up. 
• I have a ton more designs ready to go, just need to think of an organized format on how I want to introduce new items to the shop:  weekly, bi-weekly, monthly? 

I still need to:

• Cut my tea towels and napkins to the correct dimensions so they are ready for printing.
• Configure some sort of drying rack.  Up until this point, my printing has been very small runs, so I have not needed anything special for drying.  Thinking maybe just a clothesline hung up in the garage.  This is so very Mom-n-Pop, I but I think that will be part of the appeal.
• Get my business cards printed.
• Scout out upcoming local craft fairs for 2011 and start the registration/jury process if applicable.
• Nail down a mapped out blogging schedule.  It has to be more than my sporadic posts, yet something that is doable between everything else that is going on...namely the two halves of my heart pulling on my pant legs wanting dinner. ;)
• Just get more organized in general.

Oh yeah, and on top of all this, I'm also co-planning a huge family Christmas party on December 11th, and starting to plan my Junior Mint's 2nd B-day Party for January...it's a carnival theme and it is going to be so cute! 

At this point, I think I'll rule out sleep.  As my husband says, you can sleep when you're dead! 

I Have A Plus 3

I recently RSVP'd to a holiday party, and I marked "Yes" with a "+3" option. At the time I had no idea why it struck me, marking that option...but it did.


I sat and stared a few extra moments at the "+3".


I remember a time, that doesn't seem so long ago, that I really whole-heartily believed I would be single for life. That I would never get married, have kids, and I was just going to be that work-a-holic chick that movies are made of. Don't get me wrong, it's not that I didn't want to be married or have kids, but I just thought it wasn't in the cards for me. I never really dated much, and the few relationships I had were complete and utter failures. I knew I had my flaws...my extra baggage. I just didn't believe I would ever find someone to love me and be so willing to carry my heavy bags.


Now, here I am a decade later, and I have spent that decade with the most amazing man. We just celebrated 7 years of marriage, and we have 2 beautiful, healthy children. I have a "+3". I say it all the time, but it is so true...he is the calm to my storm. Everything I hate about myself, he loves. Even if those flaws irritate him at times, he tells me that they make me who I am, and he loves me for me. He's glued my broken pieces back together more times than I can count, and yet still thinks it's worth saving despite the many crevices and cracks and bumpy finish.


I'm quite certain I would die without him. He is my perfect person, and he makes me a better person. Our life is not perfect. We have bills, more debt than we'd like to have, we don't drive the best cars, or have the most expensive things, and I'd be lying if I didn't say that I wish at times it was easier. But, I know we have a love that lasts a lifetime. So, I'd give up all the riches in the world and live my simple humble existence knowing that I have my perfect person right there with me.


I've been going through some "growing pains" with some relationships I have. I can't help but feel hurt because these people were supposed to be close to me. To accept me for who I am, not what I have or don't have. It takes a lot for me to put myself out there, and then when I get punched in the gut, it throws me for a huge loop. I guess it's hard for me, and hurts me because I'm friends with people based off of how we get along...how our personalities match, etc. I don't give a shit what color you are, who you sleep with, what car you drive, where you shop, if you make more or less money than me. But, some people do care about all that, and I'm finding it out the hard way, and I'll stop now, because I'm just rambling like a twit.


So, I guess I tripped out on the "+3" because...I now have a "+3". They deserve all the best of me. Not the leftovers of the "me" trying to fit in with people who don't really care. My life is complete. I have a family that I adore with every fiber of my being, and I am truly thankful for each one of them.


I got very good advice from a wise friend: "Try to find balance. Don't waste so much energy and time on something that doesn't deserve it. Just make sure if the scale tips...it tips towards the things you love the very most."


Amen.

On The Verge...

Of something great...I do believe.  Ever since "Someday" vacated my mind, I've been making progress on something very near and dear to my heart.  I promise to share as the time gets closer, but I'm hoping for a late fall/early winter launch.


I read that successful people/entrepreneurs "do"...they don't sit and think about doing, and they don't wait for the universe to be perfectly aligned.  They simply "do" and they divide and conquer as they go.  Sure, they plan, but they don't plan for every single tiny nuance or "what-if" like I have been doing for the better part of a year.  I guess part of my problem has been fear.  As always.  Fear of failing, fear of the possibility of succeeding.  I guess fear of changing, even though that is what I really want.

In the last few days, I feel like my creative flood gates have been torn down.  I'm filling pages and pages of journals and sketchbooks, and it feels great.  I can't wait to finally start "doing"!

It's amazing what you can do and what you can envision, when you are open to changing your way of thinking...no matter how long it's been ingrained.

Here's to creativity, living life to the fullest, and conquering fear! (I'm holding up my imaginary beer mug.  I don't do wine...I know, I know...it's just not my thing!)

Happy Wednesday!

Someday...

I've lived a lot of my life hinging on the hope of Someday. In the beginning I used it all the time as a way to keep my dreams alive. To not give up. To look forward to something. If you don't have Someday then why get up in the morning? This was my mantra for the better part of my 20's and the first few years of my 30's.


Lately, things are wonky. But, I couldn't quite put my finger on it. I've been feeling like I take a left when everybody else is taking a right, but I really want to take a right, but I don't and choose left, then I'm regretting. I hate regret.


My husband has been feeling the same way, but we just couldn't put our fingers on it. Then on the 4th of July he woke me up out of a dead sleep at 1:30 in the morning. He had written this blog and wanted me to read it. Right there in that very second, he had the answer to our woes. It couldn't wait for morning. To be honest, in the moment I was kinda confused...I was groggy after all, but then we had a really deep conversation in the middle of the night that had changed everything.


Someday is bad. Someday is very bad. Someday allows you to fail. Someday allows you talk a big game without producing any real results. Someday allows you to live in a dream world. Someday had been suffocating me...us...for a very long time.


So, on that night, we vowed to not use that word. That doesn't mean we've given up goals and dreams, but we've set realistic expectations and we're going more with the flow. We've stopped freaking out about where we thought we would be versus where we currently are.


Since that night, our moods are much lighter, we have found out that making decisions on some things we wrestled with before are much easier to tackle now that Someday has been banished.


Since this epiphany in our lives, some bizarro stuff has been happening to both of us. I'm a total "sign reader", and I've been getting some pretty heavy signs lately. Usually Greg just kinda looks at me like, "Really, you think that is a sign? Whatever." But, he's been getting some too lately. It's like God is letting us know we've finally figured it out...like it was the magic key for us to unlock the door to the next phase of our lives. We're getting His message loud and clear.


So, the other night we go see the Knight & Day with Tom Cruise & Cameron Diaz (usually can't stand these two, but they were great in this movie), and Tom's character says to Cameron's character:


"Someday. That's a dangerous word. **at this point, Greg and I look at each other and our eyes are practically popping out of our heads** It's really just a code for "never"."


Well, you can imagine our surprise. And with that, we promised to stop dwelling on the past, start working on the now, and stop wishing for Someday.

The Power Of Love In The Kitchen

So, back when I was a little girl, I remember reading a story about a mom who made the best cookies ever. Well word got around town about her delicious cookies, and soon she was baking them for everyone. Eventually, she grew tired of it and her cookies became less popular. She moral of this story was her cookies started out so wonderful because she baked them with love. As she started making them for everyone, she wasn't putting enough love into them and they started to taste gross. I think I was maybe 7 when I read that book, and the lesson has literally stayed with me my entire life. I truly believe that if you don't cook or bake with love, it will show. I know I've rushed my way through something or cursed along the way through a recipe, and it always turns out like crap.


But when you put your heart and soul into a dish...pure magic happens. Case in point below...


This year, I had no idea what to get my Dad for Father's Day. He's a simple man, never really wants for much. And, with the hobbies he does enjoy: fishing, hunting, gardening, he could open up his own Outfitter store with all the supplies he has. I thought about a gift certificate, blah...then I remembered it takes an act of God to get him to go to any retail store on his own, unless it's 6pm on Christmas Eve.


Then I knew what I wanted to do. Make him his favorite dessert: Banana Pudding. My Grandmother used to make it all the time, and it was epic. Yes, it's very simple, but it's a little time consuming when you make it the way she did...lining a round bowl with vanilla wafers, bananas, and homemade, from scratch, vanilla pudding. It not only had to taste good, but it had to look pretty too. I know her pudding always turned out so awesome because she cooked with love. She was a Southern Woman, and what better way to show your family how much they mattered to you, but by cooking. And, cooking great food. I remember every time we'd visit, she'd let me help her make homemade biscuits. OMG...I can't still smell them and taste them if I think long enough about it. My Grandmother also always made the banana pudding in this old Pyrex bowl with a wheat and eagle pattern on it. She died when I was 15. And it wasn't until several years later that I inherited her bowl when my Dad cleaned out my grandparents house. I couldn't believe he gave it to me. I thought for sure my Mom would've had dibs on it. But, my Dad knew I'd love it because I liked to bake so much. My mom can bake, but she doesn't love it...cooking is her passion. So, I was bestowed with The Bowl.


Now, packaging is sometimes just as important as the present itself. So, I made his pudding in my Grandmother's bowl. The same bowl that she used to make it in when he was growing up. He loved it. I knew he would. I knew this was the best present I could give him that money couldn't buy. A flashback of his own mother making the pudding, a taste that triggers memories of his youth, a simple dish that always reminds him of his mother.


Priceless.


And here is the email from my Dad that brought me to tears:


Olivia,


If I didn't know better I would say Grandma came down from Heaven and made that absolutely best ever banana pudding I have ever eaten. Mom and Cameron thought so too. Thank you so much and I love you all.


Dad


So, my moral of this post? Cook and bake with love. Don't focus on the monetary things in life...when it's all said and done, they never matter anyway.


Happy Day!

Greener Wednesdays: Paying Attention

As I continue on my green journey, I am finding out it's a lot easier than I expected.  Cheaper?  No.  But when it comes to mine and mine family's health, should price really factor in?  No it shouldn't.  It just takes creative financing.  Shifting dollars from here to there.  Say for instance, you are a paper towel freak (like I am, trying to ween off our reliance on these buggers), but you reduce or eliminate your need for them and switch to reusable cotton towels, napkins, etc., you can take those dollars you would normally spend and apply them some place else, like better hygiene products, better meats, organic produce, etc.  You just have to make the choice, and work towards it.  It can be overwhelming, but it's also very enlightening as you learn about making better choices.

It's also addicting.  I first started my green transition by simply choosing to recycle all paper and plastic products in my house.  I want to gag when I think about all that I used to contribute unnecessarily to the landfill, but we've committed to change and we're encouraging others to change, and that is what matters most.   Once we really decided to recycle, I would say 3/4 of what I'd normally throw away was recyclable.  I was amazed at how much my little house could contribute to greener practices.  Then I naturally wanted to focus on green eating and cleaning.  Once we get into a more permanent housing situation, where I can actually have a garden, I plan to start composting as well.  Recycling really is easy once you decide to do it.  The problem that I've noticed with a lot of people, myself included, is they don't think they can make a difference.  But can you imagine the damage we could halt and potentially turn around if everyone had a green epiphany?  My mom kinda had that mentality until I was telling her some information I had learned.  She was disgusted and since has started recycling in her home.  Yay Mom!  My 5 year-old daughter, used to just throw away her yogurt and applesauce cups until I made her dig it out of the garbage can (don't worry, it was right after she had done it and it was on top), wash it, and put it into the recycle box.  She gets it now.  She doesn't want "God's Beautiful Earth to be dirty and gross."  She now knows to recycle.  In fact, she has requested that we go around our neighborhood this weekend and pick up any trash we might find.  *melt-my-heart*.  I feel I owe it to her as a parent to instill these values young.  And at this point, she just wants to help out and do whatever I'm doing.  It's a win-win situation.  Speaking of applesauce & yogurt cups...a lot of waste there.  I have now started buying a big jar of applesauce and yogurt vs. a bunch of individual servings.  You might now think things like this don't make a difference, but they do.

We're also being aware and paying attention to things like water and electricity waste.  Turning off lights, appliances, etc. when not in use.  Teaching Penelope to not go overboard when washing her hands or bathing. 

No, Penelope...you don't need 12 pumps of soap to wash your hands.  One is enough.  

Teaching her to not dump half the bottle of shampoo on her head.  These things also go along with her learning to be independent, but if I can teach her a lesson about not wasting, it's worth it.  She's very diligent about things once she learns the reasoning behind them.  It's so cute to watch her want to make a difference.   She doesn't fully get it all yet, but I can't wait until the day she really understands what an impact she is making to live a sustainable life.

I'm also learning that by living a more green life, it naturally makes it a simpler life.  At least for me.  We are less impulsive, think before we spend, weigh our options instead of buying based on convenience.  It takes time, but it feels good to make these changes!

What are some of your favorite green practices?  Have you always been green?  What was your green epiphany?  Please leave a comment if you'd like!  I'd love to hear all your great stories & tips!

Greener Wednesdays

Hi there! 

On my quest to be a better, greener person, I thought I'd share a few things I'm doing as I slowly turn my home and life into a greener one.  I'm sure I don't have to tell you, but it's freakin' expensive to live healthy.  Shit.  But, it's worth it, so you gotta try right? Right.  I just have to try in baby steps and rearrange my budget.

Well, I was going to do a post on this laundry detergent I stumbled across at Lowe's, but Apartment Therapy beat me to it. 

Read about it here.  So, a few weeks back I bought the small bottle, good for 25 loads because I was very skeptical.  The size of the bottle was the same as a SMALL dish soap bottle.  25 loads from that?  Yeah right.  But once I tried it, I was hooked!  Four pumps is all you need.  No joke.  I get the Fresh Air scent.  I recently just bought the 50 load bottle and I won't be turning back.  It's the same price as other detergents, it's a lot greener than other detergents, it cleans wonderfully, it can work in high-efficiency machines, AND the packaging is SO SMALL compared to all other detergents.  Try it for yourself, here is a coupon!

Check out this blog post on Jessica O'Brien's blog: Under Construction (her maiden name is in the web address, so don't be confused :).  Her hubby owns a green store called The Green Life in Santa Monica, CA, and he only stocks health and beauty products that are rated 4 and under on the Cosmetic Safety Database.  What's that you ask?  Oh, it only lists out almost every health and beauty product known to man and how they rate on scale of 0 (awesome) to 10 (awful) based on their ingredient list.  Dude, check it out and put some of the products in that you use on a daily basis.  You will be disgusted.  I was most disgusted by the awful ratings my baby products got.  I'm definitely changing all my products one at a time, starting with all the products I use for my kids.

Lastly, here is just some cute inspiration for some fence decoration.  I would love to do this with herbs and really make the pots in crazy colors and designs.  If you'd like to see the entire post on Apartment Therapy, go here.

image taken from Apartment Therapy site.

Oh, one more thing.  On The Splendid Miss M's blog awhile back she gave awesome tips on making your own green cleaning supplies, etc.  She uses vinegar as fabric softener, and thanks to her I do too now.  It's so cheap, totally green, your clothes actually get clean, are very soft and I swear they do not stink like vinegar.  Just put the vinegar in the fabric softener spot and be prepared to save some cash!